our scars remind us, the past is real.

new el-jay. 


hullo_gorgeous

thePatrickmyster (3:21:33 PM): i'll let you in on a little secret
unlike ne1 uknow (3:22:03 PM): what's the secret?
thePatrickmyster (3:23:58 PM): sometimes, when the sunlight would just be breaking through the window, i would wake up and see you sleeping, and the covers would be just barely off you, and it reminded me of how you are the most amazing creation i've ever seen



... now i remember.

i really really miss you.



---


that's all.

do you ever listen to a song that makes you shiver? this song. is. my. life.

---

A strangled smile fell from your face
It kills me that I hurt you this way
The worst part is that I didn't even know
Now there's a million reasons for you to go
But if you can find a reason to stay

I'll do whatever it takes
To turn this around
I know what's at stake
I know that I've let you down
And if you give me a chance
Believe that I can change
I'll keep us together whatever it takes

She said "If we're gonna make this work
You gotta let me inside even though it hurts
Don't hide the broken parts that I need to see"
She said "Like it or not it's the way it's gotta be
You gotta love yourself if you can ever love me"

I'll do whatever it takes
To turn this around
I know what's at stake
I know that I've let you down
And if you give me a chance
And give me a break
I'll keep us together, I know you deserve much better

But remember the time I told you the way that I felt
That I'd be lost without you and never find myself
Let's hold onto each other above everything else
Start over, start over

I'll do whatever it takes
To turn this around
I know what's at stake
I know I've let you down
And if you give me a chance
and believe that I can change
I'll keep us together whatever it takes

i've become obsessed with this song that starts:

"one two three four tell me that you love me more.."

who sings it? & what is it called?

i need to know.
the suspense is killing me.

my peanut is here.

& i have never been more in love with someone in my entire life.

i'm so tired of being pregnant.
come on lilli. just get here.

so. clearly i haven't written in like, a century.
i'm in florida. visiting patrick's family on his pre-deployment leave. sad.
we're having a girl. not sad.
her name is going to be lillian grace.
i'm going to call her lilly.
tomorrow we're going to disney world for the day.

we have a chihuahua named ron.
i love & spoil him to death. he's the cutest thing ever.
patrick leaves on the 15th of january.
i am getting more & more flustered by the day.
i feel as big as a whale.
now, when the baby kicks you can see it on the outside of my belly.
it's absolutely amazing.

& honestly, i have never been more content than i am right now, being loved & fat & happy with my husband & growing little bean. & of course, ron. :]

i'm moving back to virginia the weekend of the 20th of january.
& then all we've got to do is wait for lilly to get here.

i cannot wait.

stay safe lovlies, & merry christmas. :]

FRIENDS ONLY.

comment to be added, cutiepants.
[i'm serious.]